T minus 13 days

I think there comes a point in every mom's life when they realize that their child isn't ever going to be a baby again. For me, that point was today. And it was depressing.

I don't know if it's the fact that his 2nd birthday is coming up in 13 days or if it's the fact that he told me he wanted ice cream in a bowl for lunch, but it hit me hard that I will never have that 7 pound little squishy baby back. The one who slept in until 9 right next to me in my bed, the one who only smiled at my voice, the one who I would wake up with 3 times a night to feed. I remember how quiet the house was and how I would just stare at him when he slept.

Another thing that hit me today- In just 2011, I have been called a "fake mom", I've been told that I'm selfish, I've had people say that they don't like me who don't know me, I've been told that I'm not fun, I've had people who I thought were my friends completely betray me, I've been called every name in the book... I like to think of myself as kind of a strong person, but there is only so much one person can take. I mean what is this, high school? So I ask all of you calling me these names and saying horrible things about me- Do you know me at all? Do you know my situation? Do you know my side of the story? Do you know what really happened?

My guess is, you don't.

When sad times happen, Aden knows it. Today we sat in his room and I watched this happen:

and then I cried. Because sometimes, people suck.

P.S.- don't whine if I delete you on facebook. It's facebook. And I probably have a reason I don't want you looking at pictures of me or my son.